{"id":207,"date":"2011-01-05T21:50:48","date_gmt":"2011-01-06T04:50:48","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/synaesthetic.com\/?p=207"},"modified":"2011-01-05T22:00:47","modified_gmt":"2011-01-06T05:00:47","slug":"bathroom-rant","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/synaesthetic.com\/?p=207","title":{"rendered":"bathroom rant"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>A few weeks ago i&#8217;m at work and need to use the toilet. It happens to the best of us. There&#8217;s one in a wing of the school that isn&#8217;t as trafficked as the others- so that&#8217;s where i go. Besides, it&#8217;s in the middle of class so what are the chances that anyone else is going to need it?<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;m in there minding my business and a knock comes on the door. &#8220;Busy!&#8221; i reply. I guess i could have shouted something else like, &#8220;No thanks! I&#8217;m doing fine by myself&#8221; or &#8220;POOPIES ARE HERE!&#8221;, but i don&#8217;t. &#8220;Busy&#8221; seems to be relatively well contained and self\u00a0explanatory.<br \/>\n<!--more--><br \/>\nLess than two minutes later, the same person knocks again. No, really? Think about it for a second. I&#8217;m in a bathroom that has precisely 3 vectors for entry and exit. One is the door that you&#8217;re standing outside of, the other is below where i&#8217;m sitting and the other is the hole at the bottom of the sink. Now, you&#8217;re in a school and seeing as how you&#8217;re knocking on the door of a staff bathroom, and i&#8217;m pretty sure you&#8217;re not a student, it should be mostly obvious to anything from a mollusk on up that chances are that i&#8217;m still in there. In fact, chances are that i&#8217;m STILL FUCKING BUSY.<\/p>\n<p>You idiot. And you work in a school? Was having \u00a0the other staff bathroom 6 feet away somehow confuse you?<\/p>\n<p>(note: i do not know who this staff member was- i had never seen her before nor have i seen her since)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A few weeks ago i&#8217;m at work and need to use the toilet. It happens to the best of us. There&#8217;s one in a wing of the school that isn&#8217;t as trafficked as the others- so that&#8217;s where i go. Besides, it&#8217;s in the middle of class so what are the chances that anyone else &hellip; <\/p>\n<p class=\"link-more\"><a href=\"https:\/\/synaesthetic.com\/?p=207\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading<span class=\"screen-reader-text\"> &#8220;bathroom rant&#8221;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-207","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/synaesthetic.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/207","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/synaesthetic.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/synaesthetic.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/synaesthetic.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/synaesthetic.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=207"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/synaesthetic.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/207\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":210,"href":"https:\/\/synaesthetic.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/207\/revisions\/210"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/synaesthetic.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=207"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/synaesthetic.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=207"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/synaesthetic.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=207"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}