wandering the sheltering sky

  • don’t waste your psychologists time

    Sigh. Once again someone has admitted to me that they are not being honest with their psychologist. Why do you even bother to go? Yes, there’s a difference between eventually disclosing all of your issues; that i get. But that’s not what i’m talking about here. This is a situation where someone is deliberately withholding… Read more

  • more bad news

    I just received some bad news. I’m so tired of this. I am so beaten up. From months and months of emotional isolation to a profoundly difficult breakup (ironically, i’m now seeing this as a positive thing) to a coworker who, for three years, constantly asked me where i was going, where i was at… Read more

  • and now… glasses.

    I had an eye exam a few days ago. The verdict is that while my vision remains very strong, i also have a mild astigmatism. I have to say, the glasses have made reading, especially at night, much, much easier. Read more

  • message

    PREFACE: This note is no longer offered to the person it was intended for. The string of notes she sent me in July revealed the content of her character and, ironically, was the last push i needed to realize that i’d rather be a man that dated and loved women than to have her in… Read more

  • why i am drinking right now

    I do not drink much. In the last four or so months, i’ve had two pints of beer and i tried to have a shot of rye just to see what rye was like. I got half way through it. I think it’s pretty safe to say that i am not a whiskey drinker. Right… Read more

  • aftermath | things to work on within myself

    I will work on identifying and discussing instances where I feel a boundary or expectation has been broken in a timely and constructive manner. I will not use coping strategies that erode my self respect nor the respect or trust I have for my girlfriend(s) I will work on not letting the pain and heartbreak… Read more

  • aftermath | perspective, things that i am worthy of

    I continue to pull the emotional shrapnel out of the wounds that were given to me. It’s an ongoing process but i am amazed at the amount of healing i have done since my world came apart at the seams in late October. Well, truth be told, it came apart on the 3rd of October… Read more

  • giving away my copy of Risk 2210

    This is a post i recently left on my TF2 clans page (even though i seldom play, let alone enjoy playing, video games these days, my TF2 clan runs a good forum). Apparently some people found my latest post amusing. Years ago i bought a copy of Risk 2210. Unfortunately i never played it and… Read more

  • click.

    I’m talking to him a couple of weeks ago. He’s one of the many people that have helped me salvage my objectivity and has helped me understand, not just the process of grieving, but he’s helped me identify some of my behaviors such as how and why i allowed my dignity to be eroded to… Read more

  • hurt

    I haven’t been home much this weekend. Errands, a lunch w/ friend, a new television machine (even though i haven’t watched television shows in years), running both Friday and Saturday and then dancing Saturday night. So i was looking forward to having a nice, simple meal. Fish, crabcake, brocolli, silence. I guess i got as… Read more