Month: March 2013

I will work on identifying and discussing instances where I feel a boundary or expectation has been broken in a timely and constructive manner.

I will not use coping strategies that erode my self respect nor the respect or trust I have for my girlfriend(s)

I will work on not letting the pain and heartbreak in my past define who I am.

I will work on being more aware of happiness in my life and showing it.

I will work on finding my brightness that I usually have and making sure it is something people immediately see in me.

When I have been hurt, especially if I’ve been bullied by someone I love, I will not respond with indifference nor deliberate cruelty. I will seek to find the cause of their hurt first and see what can be done to heal it and i expect her to be mature/ developed/ self actualized enough to do the same.

I will work to address why i have a disproportionate appreciation for women and stop deifying them.

I have absolutely amazing friends. The brightness i give to the world is the brightness they have taught and shared with me.

I will not disqualify someone from dating if they have survived abuse and/or neglect. BUT if they have not fully dealt with that injury, i will not become involved with them.

I will continue to salvage my dignity and objectivity.

I will find my confidence again.

I will shine again.

I continue to pull the emotional shrapnel out of the wounds that were given to me. It’s an ongoing process but i am amazed at the amount of healing i have done since my world came apart at the seams in late October. Well, truth be told, it came apart on the 3rd of October but that’s a story for another post.

To everyone that knows my story and to everyone that has read the emails sent to me (3 Oct. & 25 Dec., last year) and seen the picture posted that someone else took of them next to the pictures i had taken (which illustrated what i was thought of and the role i was to play in her world as well as the role that her other lover was to play that i was deliberately excluded from and kept ignorant of).
Continue reading “aftermath | perspective, things that i am worthy of”