the disconnect | part two

Once upon a time i used to write, if not prolifically, then at least with some frequency. It’s hard to point to when i shifted but i think it was about a decade or ago when i went through my last breakup. My posts have become sporadic at best because my motivation to write just… changed.

Tonight is not the night that i continue this entry but i wanted to put this out there because for anyone reading, i haven’t forgotten nor will i wait until next year to continue, which has been the frequency i’ve had for the last decade.

I’m also putting this here as a challenge to myself to sit down and gather my thoughts and continue this because… well, just because.

There are strands that will be inextricably tied to one another but for me to do so will require sitting down and actually teasing those strands apart, just to find a way to braid them together again. And these evenings, i’m actually painting which requires all of my focus.

Still, this story will continue; hopefully by the end of this week at the latest.

Continue reading “the disconnect | part two”

the disconnect | part one

In my mind, this will be written in three parts. The reasons behind the title may not become clear until the end.

It was about 10 months ago; maybe a year by now. Someone from my past sent me a message on FB saying hello. It was from a woman i dated in my misspent youth. To say it was unexpected is an understatement because, to be honest, i was as ass to her.

Rewind.

It’s 1990 or 91. I’m 23 years old. I am very emotionally undeveloped, inexperienced in both sex and relationships and as the saying goes, i was the embodiment of being “young, dumb and full of cum”. And it was about this time i made one of the biggest mistakes one can ever make at this age or any age for that matter- i dated someone that i worked with.

It was a wafer fab in austin and we worked the swing shift (16.00 to midnight). I fell for her, she liked me and we proceeded to spend 28 of the next 30 days with each other. Work, eat, sleep, fuck. Work, eat, sleep, fuck. Work. Eat. Sleep. Fuck. I’m not being crude or at least i’m not trying to be crude. We were young, horny and well… young and horny. 

Continue reading “the disconnect | part one”