on gay marriage

A few minutes ago, OKCupid had a question about how i feel about “Gay Marriage.”

I find the phrase repulsive. It’s marriage- period.

Marriage is a legally binding contract that describes, among other things, rights of shared ownership and property. It is not a license/ contract that is contingent on mutual love, it is not a contract that is issued based on the ability of others to breed.

As a man with a vasectomy and having never bred (i was born without any paternal instinct or it was drummed out of me at an early age), i am filled with contempt when people claim that breeding, or at least the potential to breed, is how marriage is validated. The same goes for those that claim some book validates what marriage is and that book should therefore be forced upon all of us.

In a moment of snark, i cannot help but to observe that with the continuing “outrage” of “Gay Marriage,” that those most vocal about “protecting the sanctity of marriage” have done absolutely nothing to make divorce illegal.

Yet, in this case, we have allowed the rights of Due Process and Equal Access to be limited to those claiming to be hetero-normative because of the belief systems of others; belief systems based on conjecture, speculation, dogma and in many cases, rigid fundamentalism. We have failed in our collective critical thinking to assert that the separation of church and state should be enforced here with more tenacity than perhaps every other aspect of individual liberty and justice.

And if there’s doubt as to the fallacy of allowing religion having a “legitimate” say in this matter, consider the following: Where is the license to marry issued? In a church or in a courthouse? When a divorce takes place, where is that divorce officially settled? In a church or in a courthouse? Religion exists to address the spiritual needs of people. It does not exist to mandate or force their beliefs on others, be they a majority or minority of people. This is not to confuse the origin of religious based morals against those of secular ethics, mind you. The latter can exist without the existence of the former.

Personally i believe marriage should simply be a legally binding document that is between consenting, non-related adults. If i am dating someone and we fall in love with another woman, i do not believe the state has the right to deny our right to marry each other. I do not care about the legal logistics of such an arrangement nor am i concerned about “societal norms”. Laws should not be crafted because they are easily understood or because they seek to address special interests. They should be crafted with the mantra of, “…with liberty and justice for all,” first and foremost.

And if lawmakers do not understand that, they shouldn’t be lawmakers in the first place.